Shanti Dinner Address

Delivered by Randy Allgaier

November 19, 1996

Thank you very much for this honor.  Over the past 8 years Shanti has been an important part of my life.  Through Shanti I have met some remarkable individuals including the people in San Francisco that I call family-  Karen Kempler, Kim Weppener and most importantly- my partner of 8 years,  Lee Hawn. 

I want to dedicate this award to Lee-  he is my rock, my best friend, often my sounding board and always a part of my soul and I cannot imagine my life without him.

However, since I've only been given two minutes to speak, I would like use that time to issue two challenges to those of us here this evening. 

The first is to those of us who support AIDS organizations- both financially and with our time.  I think that most of us are aware of the promising news about protease inhibitors and other drugs that the media have been reporting since the Vancouver conference.  It is regarding these drugs that I  challenge us all to be cautiously optimistic.  I know that for many of us this disease has been wrecking havoc on our lives and taking away our loved ones for 15 years and we are tired.  However, we cannot make the leap that these drugs are the magic bullet  and in the process lose sight of a very important realitythe here and now. 

Right now many men and women are becoming  infected.right now young gay men of color are among the highest groups at risk for new HIV infectionright now there are many people living with HIV who also have mental health and/or substance use issues and need services to provide the support that can help them control their lives enough to consider the regimen necessary for combination therapy and stick to it.  Right now  protease inhibitors show little or no efficacy for some people, and right now - wonderfully gifted people like Mary Corwin continue to be snatched away from us while in their prime.  We cannot place all of our hopes and resources into these drugs at the expense of services, prevention and care.  They are all vital and, quite frankly, none of them has enough money.

I pray for the day when I will be able to say that HIV is no longer a threat I long for the day when  HIV has been eliminated from my body and I am cured.  But we must not be so  anxious for that day that we become careless.  I am hopeful about these drugs, but I will not prematurely shift all my attention there.  People still need services.  Prevention, care, services and treatment are all important and inter-linked components to our battle with this disease.  We must all commit ourselves to ensuring that every one of these elements continues receiving our support.

My second challenge is to those folks here tonight that lead AIDS services in this city- board members, program directors, executive directors  all of us that have made fighting this disease our avocation.   I believe that we are at a critical point in the history of this epidemic and we all need to assess our passion for this work.  There are new challenges that lay ahead and it will be no place for individuals interested in maintaining the status quo. 

Passion about AIDS is vital to creating the visionary  approaches that will be necessary in order to meet the new challenges that await us.  Quite frankly, if  you can't muster up that fire in your belly around AIDS, if this is just another social issue for you, if this has become a profession instead of a passion, if this is just another board membership- in all due respect and gratitude for your work- it is time for you to go.   The future will be difficult and it will require us to be creative and to develop innovative  and sophisticated programs.  Without passion we will lack the fuel that propels  innovation and creativity.  We cannot afford to be held back by individuals or by organizations, for that matter,  that cannot rise to the occasion.

I hope that we all  seriously consider these two challenges.   We are at an important fork in the road..   If we take up to these challenges, I believe that we will be on the right path the one that will take us to that day we all hope forthat day where dinners like this will no longer be necessary, and where we will all finally have the time to come to grips with the enormity of the losses that this disease has heaped upon usgiving us the time we need to grieve, truly grieve, so we can heal, go on and live life never forgetting those that we have lost.

Thank you.